Avoiding disaster when you move in with your significant other
You’re taking the plunge and moving in with your significant other? How adorable! The honeymoon period will be awesome, but after the bliss inspired by the newness of it all fades away, you may face some unforeseen challenges. Before, during, and after moving in with your boyfriend or girlfriend, keep some of these thoughts in mind to help manage your new living arrangement:
Are you really in love? Think it through, the heart can be a discouragingly imperfect adviser. Living together means you will be LIVING TOGETHER!!! Not having the safety of your own house or apartment to retreat to when the going gets a little tough may quickly illuminate the distinction between “love” and “like.”
Have room to breathe. A small place might seem like a great idea with your girlfriend or boyfriend – after all, who better to snuggle up with in a cozy 1-bedroom than your enamorado? But transitioning from the boundless freedom of single living to the relative constraints of sharing a home can create tensions, even with someone you love dearly. An effective release valve for those tensions is having a home large enough to include room for each of you to enjoy a measure of alone time.
Even though you’re sharing a bedroom and an extra room may seem superfluous, consider a 2-bedroom place to ensure that each of you has a place to occasionally retreat and find some private space. Use that extra room as a game room, home office, crash pad for guests, library, workout room.
Have room for your stuff to breathe. Combining all your stuff into one home may be more daunting than you thought. When space is at a premium, arguments over whose cherished stuff stays and who has to put keepsakes on Craigslist or in storage can be dispiriting. Tiny apartments mean more of those arguments, which can end your honeymoon period before it gets started.
Always make time to talk. We’ll end with a little relationship advice. Always find time to talk about things, the good and the bad. Talk through problems to ensure annoyances don’t devolve into grievances. Talk about the good things, as well – communication should not only be about what’s going wrong.