Four (plus more) reasons not to date your roommate
Dating a coworker is a terrible idea; things usually get messy and could possibly cost you your job. There are worse relationship moves out there though. Dating a roommate is an equally horrific idea. Here are just 4 reasons of the hundreds for why you should absolutely avoid dating a roommate:
Living with a boyfriend or girlfriend is NOT the same as dating someone you live with. So what’s the distinction? Speaking to the majority of cases, a successful relationship needs to work through phases as each person gets to know the other. Dating the person who already lives down the hall is like jumping from the, two awkward people on a first date phase, to the phase right before those wedding bells chime. Who does that?
Just because you may have known you roommate for a substantial amount of time before the prospect of dating came along, knowing someone as a friend or roommate is completely different than knowing a person as a significant other. Don’t convince yourself that dating the tidy guy down the hall is the same thing as living with a boyfriend. These are two completely different animals, my friend!
Even before move-in day, there was an agreement reached between all parties as to how much each person is responsible to pay each month. Perfect. These predetermined rules are set to prevent arguments, tension, or resentment down the road. The agreement that your new boy or girlfriend is to $50 more per month due to their larger room, may lead to a point of contention when you two begin to share that giant sized room. Should they really need to pay extra now? You see where this is headed.
Your home, or your room is the one place you are able to break from the world, be productive, and not freak out on people at the office. The first few months spent getting to know someone in a relationship are completely up in the air; you never know if a huge deal-breaker lay just around the corner. Living with your brand new boy or girlfriend is like being on a date…all the time…until there is a breakup or the lease expires. Just think about it.
4. The Breakup
It’s terrible to consider the worst-case scenario when you just begin to build an attachment with someone new, but in the case of dating a roommate, you really must think ahead on this one. If things don’t work out, will you still be okay living in the same space with that other person? Could you handle looking at their face everyday or having to witness them bringing someone new home one night? If you can honestly say yes, then go you! You’re a bigger person than most.
Imagine the breakup goes poorly, who should move out? This may not be a simple matter. Consider the weeks it would likely take to find a new place, make arrangements, and all of the costs associated, all the while having to live with your ex. Yuck, no thank you!
We are all human, and we can at times make some crazy emotional decisions rather than considering all of the angles and putting those lustful thoughts aside. That’s fine, it happens. All I have to say is to consider the landscape of your new life, the day-to-day events, future plans, and about 3,000 other factors before you decide to cross that line between roommate and bedmate.